Tuesday, July 24, 2007

The Reunion

Together again, in the palace I call the 'Royal National' yet Chesty calls the 7th level of hell (Etap hotel in Leeds is the 9th level, closely followed by Aintree B&B which touches down at a resounding 12th). It was small, quaint and smelt of wet dog and bok choy but it was of no matter (to me) as we were reunited after months of estrangement. A celebration was definately in order. And where better to celebrate a hellish separation but in hell itself so we had a picnic in our current abode, the Royal National. Environment means nothing when you're surrounded by loved ones and dutch smoked cheese. So we ate, drank and were merry as we relived our tales of travel and discussed our future plans and adventures in the land of Eng.













Goodbye Bus Hello Sex

Even the greatest chapters written in the pages of history must come to an end and this Great Piratical Rumbustification that I 'The Pirate', he 'The Librarian' and him 'The Robber' have embarked on dear readers is no exception. However I will not leave you bewildered like the end of an episode of 'Lost'. When one Rumbustification ends another begins as we all know a pirate can not stay ashore for too long. He craves the spray of salt from the ocean on his face, to hear the crash of the waves against the bow of his vessel and to have his misern-mast raised so without further ado I bid this voyage adieu and rejoin my wench for some land lubbing with the promise of more tales from our next Great Piratical Rumbustification; the Librarian, the Robber, and the buxom beauties Chesty Leroux (Casey) & Busty Calhoun (Carley).


"A goodbye isn't painful unless you're never going to say hello again"
~ Anonymous


Monday, July 23, 2007

Fact or Phalicy: Europe has an obession with wangs?















The Dam


I see trees of green...


She needed an epidural


Starjumps, Uncle Chop-chop style


Tommy Lee at a frat party


DJ Panfer



Full of wind



Self-explanatory shop


Dutch sasquatch


Uncool Runnings


Canadian beer coaster hat


Backdoor shenanigans



Finally found a bigger dick then me


Only $5.99 per minute


Silicone implants are like so 5 minutes ago



It was so lovely on the grass

Canal Knowledge




The tranquility of the town of Edam is pierced by the blood curling war cry that resounds from the throat of the maniacal airborne misfit. Will he or won't he is the question on everyones lips. He floats over the murky depths below for what seems like an eternity, the opposing bank seemingly so close yet so far. The front foot, thuds softly onto grass...the hind leg however touches with a resounding splash as the brown liquid engulfs the other half of himself. An uproar ensues, laughter, followed by applause. Will he be befouled by hepatitis or will his fate be far worse, a morning spent in bestenched boardshorts. Who knows, but one is reminded of these famous words, 'Do or do not, there is no try' in which the latter certainly pertains to this one drenched, odiferous 'Pirate'.

In the Spirit of...





In the spirit of Bundaberg Rum and the ANAZAC's we remembered our fallen ancestors on the 25th of April in a small bar in the town of St Goar. For some reason they served Bundy much to my chagrin but to the delight of a few banana bender's and ma staters. We donned whatever representative garb we could find and drank to those who fought for our freedom from tyranny and persecution which allowed us to be here today in the country of our former enemy, now ally, drinking side by side as all man and woman should. As the juke box blared an oh so familiar ocker ballad, and our VB and Bundy flowed freely, I draped myself in the flag our brethren fought under, and the hairs on the back of my neck stood to attention like a regiment from the sixth battalion. A small tear rolled down my cheek and I smiled a patriotic smile. I thankyou for your sacrifice from the bottom of my heart, and this beers for you.

Thursday, July 5, 2007

Munichup

Bare witness dear readers. You can now say with pride that you are an acquaintance of the Contiki record holder for number of steins drank during the 3 and a half hour period spent at the Hofbrauhaus in Munich without a technicolour yawn. This relic of a beer hall once housed the first nazi speech given by one Adolf Hitler as he attempted to brain wash a group of alcohol fuelled youths. Hardly a challenge if you ask me, however til this day it was the greatest event witnessed by the stony walls of the Hofbrauhaus. It has now been overshadowed by one man and his thirst for a record and 8 beers the size of your head. These are the results.



First beer



Second beer


Third beer


Fourth beer


Fifth beer



Sixth beer



Seventh beer



The Eighth and final beer.